Stepping into the Spotlight
Remember when you were a little kid and you played hide-and-seek? Remember hiding in a corner somewhere or behind a couch or in a closet, closing your eyes and thinking I can't see them, so they can't see me? Little kids do this all the time. In their young minds, it makes sense. They can't see the seeker, so therefore they as the hider also can't be seen.
But that isn't reality. As good as those hiding spots may be, the hiders are either found or they give up and show themselves. The seeker finds the hidden.
I was reading in 1 John 1 today, a passage that talks about how God is light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. It talks about how we say we have fellowship with him, and we say we have no sin, and by believing that, we are deceiving ourselves and living a lie. It then says if we walk in the light as He is in the light, if we confess our sins, we can live in fellowship with Him and be cleansed from all of our sins.
I couldn't stop thinking about hide-and-seek. Isn't that what we do in our faith? We, in our flawed and broken humanity, believe that if we can't see Him, He can't see us. We believe that if we keep our sins in the darkness, keep our shame hidden, push our brokenness to the background, it will never be found out and we can go on living our lives.
But that isn't reality, either. Just like those hiding spots when we were little couldn't hide us from the seeker for long, our darkness and brokenness can't stay hidden forever if we want to truly live.
He's seeking us, but we're trying to hide from Him.
We can stay in hiding, telling ourselves we aren't that bad, we aren't that sinful, we aren't that broken, but we are just deceiving ourselves. We can stay in our dark places, claiming that we are walking with the Lord, but we are lying to ourselves and to the world.
There is no darkness in God. He is light. When we step into a relationship with Him, we are stepping out of our darkness into light.
That step into the light can be terrifying. The darkness covers our pain and brokenness and shame like a blanket. The light exposes it. Yikes, right?! We don't want anyone seeing us like that, seeing us for who we truly are and for what we've done.
Here's the thing...
We can hang behind the curtains, watching the show play out on the stage before us as we linger in the shadows, cowering in fear and worry, afraid and ashamed...or we can step into the spotlight. Yes, we will step forward knowing our shame and our sins and our secrets will be exposed. But this is what is promised: when we come forward and confess it all, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
We can step forward knowing the worst in us will be met with the best of Him. We can step forward knowing that the light is where life is, the light is where He is, where His love is abundant and welcoming us with open arms.
If we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. How beautiful is that? When we step out into the light, we aren't journeying alone. We have fellowship with one another. We are surrounded by other believers. All that was broken in us, all that was bad in us, all that made us hide from Him in fear and shame is washed away, leaving us forgiven and free and found with Him.
I don't want to stay hidden. I don't want to deceive myself any longer, thinking that if I don't look at my sin, He isn't seeing it either. I don't want to lie to myself and think I'm fellowshipping with my God when I'm really walking in darkness still.
I want to walk in the light as he is in the light. I want to confess my sin, step into the light, and watch Him wash it all away.
I'm done hiding.